Looking for some awesome dirty jokes? then you are in the right place.
We just garb some best dirty jokes from all around the internet.
For your better read, we divide jokes into best dirty jokes 2021, awesome dirty jokes, funny dirty jokes, dirty jokes for adults, dirty jokes for Instagram, dirty jokes and puns, dirty jokes and riddles, funny dirty names, and dirty jokes one-liners.
Without wasting any time let’s read and laugh!

Dirty Jokes
- How does a woman scare a gynecologist?
By becoming a ventriloquist. - What’s the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
The taste! - What’s long and hard and full of semen?
A submarine! - Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
She outgrew her b-shells! - What do clowns get turned on by?
Balloon blow-up dolls. - What is six inches long, two inches wide, and makes everyone go crazy?
A $100 bill. - What does a horny frog say?
Rub it. - What did the elephant ask the naked man?
“How do you breathe out of that thing?” - What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball! - What goes in hard and dry, but comes out soft and wet?
Gum!
Best Dirty Jokes 2021
- What are the three shortest words in the English language?
“Is it in?” - What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave?
“Thanks for coming!” - How is life like toilet paper?
You’re either on a roll or taking shit from someone. - What kind of bees make milk?
Boo-bees. - What does one boob say to the other boob?
If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts. - How do you spot a blind man on a nude beach?
It’s not hard. - Why did the ketchup blush?
He saw the salad dressing. - What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
Beat it. We’re closed. - What’s the difference between your penis and a bonus check?
Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus. - Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
Awesome Dirty Jokes
- What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets. - Why is diarrhea hereditary?
It runs in your genes! - My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude.
I personally am on the fence. - Why can’t you hear rabbits making love?
Because they have cotton balls. - Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle?
Because his wife died! - What comes after 69?
Mouthwash. - What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common?
A wet nose. - How can you tell if your husband is dead?
The s** is the same, but you get to use the remote. - What do you get when you cross a dick with a potato?
A dictator! - What did the leper say to the s** worker?
Keep the tip.
Cool Dirty Jokes
- What’s long, green, and smells like bacon?
Kermit The Frog’s fingers! - What did one butt cheek say to the other?
Together, we can stop this crap. - What do you call an expert fisherman?
A Master Baiter. - How do you make your girlfriend scream during s**?
Call and tell her about it. - What does Pinocchio’s lover say to him?
“Lie to me! Lie to me!” - What’s the difference between hungry and horny?
Where you stick the cucumber. - Why did the squirrel swim on its back?
To keep its nuts dry. - How is s** like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner. - What do you get when you jingle Santa’s balls?
A white Christmas! - What do you call the lesbian version of a cock block?
A beaver dam!
Funny Dirty Jokes
- How do you make a pool table laugh?
Tickle its balls. - Why did the sperm cross the road?
Because I put on the wrong sock this morning. - What do you do when your cat’s dead?
Play with the neighbor’s pussy instead. - What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a great year. - What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public?
A private tutor! - What is Moby Dick’s dad’s name?
Papa Boner. - What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Beef strokin’ off! - How is life like toilet paper?
You’re either on a roll or taking s*** from someone. - What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip-off! - Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra.
The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals.
Dirty Jokes for Adults
- “Give it to me! Give it to me!” she yelled. “I’m so wet, give it to me now!” She could scream all she wanted,
but I was keeping the umbrella. - Why does a mermaid wear seashells?
Because she outgrew her B-shells! - I’ll admit it, I have a tremendous s** drive.
My girlfriend lives forty miles away. - A naked man broke into a church.
The police chased him around and finally caught him by the organ. - What did the toaster say to the slice of bread?
“I want you inside me.”
Dirty Jokes for Instagram
- Of course, I’m naughty. I’ve always had to compete for attention, you see.
- My boyfriend told me that he was seeing another girl. I told him to rub his eyes.
- You’re like a prize-winning fish. I don’t know whether to eat you or mount you
- Without Her Permission I Will Touch Her Only To Wipe Her Tears..!
- If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head?
- Poke me now if you’ve ever had a crush on me.
- Smile! It is the second-best thing you can do with your lips.
- Love is blind, and greed insatiable.
- A secret is what you tell everyone not to tell anyone else.
- Two word’s guys hate DON’T and STOP unless you put them together.
Funny Dirty Names
- Edward Cocaine
- Pubes Peepshow
- Betty Humper
- Dick Passwater
- The Pretzel
- The Left-Handed Stranger
- The Abe Lincoln
- Fabulous Flournoy
- Lipin Jection
- Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop
- Madka Owdiseez
- Shelby Warde and Joe Looney
- Anita Fartinghouse
- Hans Ohff
- Butter Churner
- Oliver Closeoff
- Crystal
- Anita Dump
- Kelly Ann Long and Eric Paul Wiwi
- The Vibrating Dryer
Dirty Jokes one-liners
- Naughty by Nature. Wild By Choice.
- I finally realized this, I need you more than I thought.
- You don’t have to like me, I’m not a Facebook status.
- Your parents must be retarded because you are special.
- I hate fake people. You know what I’m talking about Mannequins.
Dirty Jokes and Puns
- A naughty thought is a terrible thing to waste.
- Let’s play Titanic, you’ll be the ocean and ill go down on you.
- You Are in my Inappropriate Thoughts.
- I heard you are a player. Nice to meet you I am a Coach.
- NAUGHTY. but in a nice way.
Dirty Jokes and Riddles
- What’s four-letter word that ends in k means the same as intercourse?
Talk - I go in hard but come out soft, and I never mind if you want to blow me. What am I?
hewing Gum - What is hairy on the outside, but soft and wet on the inside and whose word starts with the letter c, and ends with a t?
Coconut - What’s at least 6 inches long, goes in our mouth, and is more fun if it vibreates?
A Toothbrush - What’s in a man’s pants that you just won’t find in a girl’s pant?
Pockets
Those jokes are not written or created by us, we just collected those jokes from social media & another third-party website.
If any of the jokes are hateful or wrong please contact us we will remove them.
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